I am working a five-week gig downtown these days and since the Spousal Unit is away this week (and especially since the snow and wind chill has made the lengthy trek from my usual parking lot less than desirable), I have decided to save us a few bucks and use his parking pass for the parkade which is just a couple of blocks from my work. I have always been hesitant to park there, partly because I didn't actually realize how close it was to where I work, but also because of all the insane ramps you have to take to access and egress the place. Mostly, though, I was terrified of the dropped ceiling between the east and west sides of the parkade. I have gotten trapped in a low-ceilinged parkade before and it scarred me for life.
But the Spousal Unit convinced me that there was no danger of me getting the Urban Assault Vehicle hung up in that parkade, even if I sat up really tall while driving, so I gave it a go.
The parkade is attached to a hotel complex, in a very convoluted hodgepodge manner that spans an entire city block. It includes not only a +15 walkway, but also a +30 walkway (which I didn't even realize was a thing) that overpasses a set of railroad tracks. Trust me, it's just as complicated as it sounds.
To get to my work from the parkade, I need to head off in the opposite direction than the Spousal Unit normally takes, so he wasn't really able to give me directions as to how to get out of the complex and onto the street that I wanted. And that was how I ended up wandering around on the ground floor with no idea of how to get there from here. I inquired of the workers at a sub place as they were preparing for the day and they told me I had to go back up to the third floor, which made no sense to me, but the next two people I encountered told me the same thing, so that's what I did. This led me to the aforementioned +30 walkway which took me over those railway tracks far beneath. Success!
Or so I thought. As I took the stairs back down to the ground floor, over on the proper side of the tracks, I realized that once you got into the stairwell there was no way out unless you had a key. Not only was I super late for work by now, but unless I busted myself out of there, some poor fool was eventually going to find my mouldering skeleton heaped in a corner.
Fortunately before I even had time to remember that I now carry a cell phone and that it can be used for something other than just texting inanities to the Spousal Unit and the OFKAR, I found an unlocked back door out of the stairwell, that led me out into the parkade, but right near where I wanted to be.
So I just walked down that ramp like Arnold Schwarzenegger, not looking back at the explosion behind me. Damn, I lose at parkades.