Wednesday, August 10, 2011

new world order

If you had to start the world from scratch:

- what sort of hierarchy would you establish?
- who would eat whom?
- would you invent a god?
- what would be the most valuable raw material?
- what would be the most prized characteristic?
- what role would otters play in the grand scheme of things?

8 comments:

Wandering Coyote said...

I love otters! I would centre my world around otters - except for food purposes, of course.

kelly said...

a randomly changing hierarchy. One day you rule..the next day you could be the otter washer

Barbara Bruederlin said...

I have a feeling our worlds would have many similarities then, WC. Otters rule!

That actually sounds like utopia, Kelly! In fact, I think I would prefer the otter washing role.

BeckEye said...

If I had to start from scratch, it would just be me, John Travolta, Eddie Vedder, Ewan McGregor and Damon Albarn. I don't know if we could all repopulate the earth, but we would have fun trying. And there might be otters, but more importantly, there would be lots and lots of seals. And puppies. And piggies.

Allison said...

Tough questions.

Clearly, otters would be a universal symbol, so they'd have to be on the flag.

Beyond that, I like the idea of a randomly changing hierarchy. Also everyone would be required to wear tophats on Tuesdays, and actively research ways to make teleportation a viable option.

John Mutford said...

I'm going to have to design a world without humans. Otherwise, seeing as I am human, I wouldn't want to be at the bottom of no stinkin' hierarchy.

So humanless world, with dolphins running the show. Sorry otters, you'll be the chimps of this world. Dolphins will think you're intelligent enough to dress you in silly costumes for their movies. Dolphins will also find a way to overrabbit the land. That's like overfishing in our world. They'll eat fillet-o-rabbit at McDonalds. Killer whales will be their polar bears. And polar bears will be their otters. Otters, as stated above will be their chimps. Chimps will be sasquatches, which, as every dolphin knows, is something made up mostly by the drunken dolphins that live in the middle of the Bering Strait. The most precious commodity will be pink coral, which the females will fashion into jewelry and the most prized characteristic are blemish free, perfectly symmetrical flukes-- few females will actually have these but plastic surgery and airbrushing will help.

bloody awful poetry said...

We would all worship otters, of course. Also I'm very taken with Beckeye's vision of the world, so let's go with that, but replace Travolta and Vedder with the likes of Jake Gyllenhaal and Michael Fassbender. Damon Albarn can stay. And we would all speak in Scottish accents all the time.

Barbara Bruederlin said...

Aw, what a sweetly utopian image that conjures up, Beckeye - you, John, Eddie, Ewan and Damon frolicking through fields of seals, puppies and piggies. Who needs repopulation when you have reached that level of perfection?

Otters flags are certainly a must, Al. And I heartily agree, one should not be allowed to graduate from high school without demonstrating at least one solid contribution toward safe, affordable, and accessible teleportation.

I am a little frightened by the depth of detail in your brave new world, John. Obviously you given this considerable previous thought. Either that or you have been hitting the absinthe bottle again. That said, I think your vision is valid. Otters are the new chimp, with the exception of the poo flinging part.

At the risk of sounding like a creepy old cougar, I very much approve your replacement male specimens, BAP. Scottish accents are certainly a must - very nice touch, that - but I suspect that they might deteriorate into bad Russian accents when too much imbibing has been done.