Sunday, February 21, 2010

my inner Olympian

My energy levels are directly inverse to the amount of Olympics I watch. The faster that skeleton sled hurls down that ice ramp, the more those sparkly sequins spin during that flying camel, the more tortured the grimaces are on those speed-skating faces, the deeper I sink into my armchair.

Knees now higher than my chin, I blurt out my patriotic cliches, and thank little baby Jeebus that I don't have to squeeze myself into any of that spandex.

14 comments:

Wandering Coyote said...

Actually, the spandex is the thing I'm enjoying most about these games!

Jas B said...

:)
I couldn't stop swaying from side to side when those speedskaters were competing, as if I were skating with them...

Allison said...

Those Hamelin brothers. The spandex. Ah. I was sad with their loss.

But Jon Montgomery after his gold medal win, auctioning off that pint of beer? Good times.

Dr. Monkey Von Monkerstein said...

The Olympics rule.

Barbara Bruederlin said...

Loving the spandex as well, WC, just not on me! And the pairs skating outfits, also not on me.

Now that's cheering them on, Jas! Did you see Xuili? We keep seeing her, hugging the skaters.

He was sure enjoying his moment, wasn't he, Al. I loved how he kept belting out O Canada, which I also heard being sung lustily by the audience at the curling. Unheard of!

They are ruling our tv these days, that's for sure, Dr M.

Anonymous said...

Alex Bilodeau...what a sweet guy!
I love my Oly mitts. Could have bought the whole table full of them at the Bay and made a tidy little profit.
Berni

Barbara Bruederlin said...

You could have sold them to Oprah evidently, Berni. Could have been the Olympic mitt supplier to the stars!

LesleyG said...

In my mind, there is no freakier competition than the skeleton. HEAD FIRST? OMG, I need alcohol just to watch it.

Charlie said...

From one voyeur to another, it's fun, ain't it.

And speaking of spandex, I think your cat could use some.

Missy said...

My energy lowers as I watch the Olympics too, my interest in them also skyrockets! If I never turned them on, then I would not even care- but once I start watching then lookout anyone who wants to use the tv!

Barbara Bruederlin said...

I need alcohol just to think about it, Lesley! What sicko thought skeleton would be a good idea?

Have you ever tried spandexing a cat, Charlie? That's more dangerous than skeleton.

It's true, Missy, Olympic viewing is akin to potato chip eating; you're okay until you start.

Sean Wraight said...

My son astutely remarked that "spandex rash" must be rampant among some of the skaters at the Winter Olympiad this year.
I'm thinking the folks at Gold Bond may have missed a real opportunity here.

Also, what's the deal with all the facepainting this year? There seems to be an unusual amount of it going on of late...

Just curious.

s

P.S. Have you ever painted any body part for a sporting event?

Barbara Bruederlin said...

"Spandex rash" is just another reason why I firmly maintain my chesterfield Olympian status, Sean.
I have never painted any body part for a sporting event, nor for a musical, theatrical, or comedy club event either. Have you?

leazwell said...

I bet when those athletes wipe out they are not thinking "nothing comes between me and my spandex" but "I wish there was something between me and my spandex."