Monday, February 09, 2009

Worst. Summit. Ever.

You call that a "hip-hop summit", Grammys? There was no discussion of foreign policy, the environment, or even any trade agreements. That is no way to run a summit, in our opinion.

This was my first time ever watching the Grammys and while I would normally leave the post-game discussions to someone like Beckeye, she appears to have passed this one by. So it's up to me to say that the Radiohead/USC Trojan Marching Band performance of 15 Step was solid and inspired. The band nerds did a great job of filling in for Colin, Ed, and Phil and I loved how they all wore Radiohead tees. Plus they got to do the YAY! part. Tom had on his nifty new little jacket and newly flowing locks, which took on a life of their own during the twitchy dancing.

I had to sit through 3 hours of Grammys first, which came close to killing me, but there were a few noteworthy moments:

Hugely preggers M.I.A. was fierce. I actually saw her being interviewed by the ET Canada lightweights on the red carpet and when she was breathlessly asked "what are you hoping for tonight", she immediately lashed out "that they will stop killing each other in Sri Lanka!" To which the interviewer gave a very lame, "oh that's a good answer."

I am confused as to why the perennially-bloated U2
performed the opening number when they weren't even nominated for anything, and even more confused why the less-than-profound lyrics were projected onto a screen behind Bono's gyrations.

The world has seen more than enough of Katy Perry and that song, although the banana elevator was pretty cool. We suspect that Phil Selway fell victim to a prank pulled by his bandmates who lured him inside to have a look and then locked him inside said banana elevator for the duration of the ceremonies. By the way the rest of Radiohead was huddled near the back of the auditorium, you just knew that they were hoping that nobody would question them about Phil's absent.

Al Green and Justin Timberlake did a great job on their duet.

Kid Rock is still disgusting even when he is not wearing a wife-beater.

Sugarland bugs the shit out of me and I cannot stand that woman's voice or her weird singing face.

You have to wonder what Chris Martin was thinking when his wife had a mini orgasm while announcing Radiohead. But then again, Coldplay took home all the hardware, so I guess Gwenyth and Chris both have things to fantasize about during post-Grammy sex.

Way too many Jonases. Also McCartneys.

This was the only reason to watch the Grammys:


Joe said...

Hard to have much of a hip hop summit with two prominent members missing because one is locked up for beating the other one.

Sean Wraight said...

You neglected to mention Bono's guyliner and the fact that he borrowed Ginger Spice's platform shoes for their opening sequence.

Now,despite my extreme wishing the Grammys remain largely a vehicle of promotion and the art part pretty much gets swept to the side. (Their newfound earlier promotions were the reason for my optimism.)

With the exception of Radiohead. That was and amazing performance and I expected nothing less from Thom. I suspected it would be inspired and I wasn't let down.

I would have liked to hear a bit more of 'Paper Planes' and less of the "summit" material too.


Allison said...

I missed U2's performance, but from the sounds of it, I did not miss much.

Oh Katy Perry. Yeah, sure she kissed a girl, but there is no greater symbolism than making a statement with that stupid banana elevator. Actually, that might be giving her too much credit.

And I think Coldplay dressed in the dark.

But yes, Radiohead put on quite a good performance. :)

Jas B said...

Barb, Radiohead performance was superb! It gave me goosebumps!

And yeah, what was with Bono's shoes?!!!

I watched the Grammy's after...say...10 years!!!

Gifted Typist said...

I've dvr'ed it and will skip through tonight. The Radiohead piece is brilliant.

"perennially-bloated U2"

They are to me what Radiohead is to you so indulge me.

If you stripped away their bigness and Bono's - at times - messianic delivery - would you be able to find anything redeeming about their music, lyrics or good works?

mister anchovy said...

I don't think I've managed to watch a whole awards show in 30 years.

Barbara Bruederlin said...

That must have been why they neglected to discuss foreign policy, Bubs. I knew there had to be a reasonable explanation.

The guyliner and the shoes! Thank you for filling in the salient points that I missed, Sean. Those were astounding and shall certainly take their places in the history books.
I guess I was expecting too much from the Grammys as well, but I guess even the presence of Radiohead doesn't stop the Grammys from being all about pumped up self-promotion.
I wish MIA had been able to sing the entire song.

Now had it been Peaches with a banana elevator, you know the symbolism would have been intentional, Al, but I think you may be right. Sometimes a fruit bowl is just a fruit bowl.
I quite liked the green Coldplay jacket with the military bars, the others less so.

Was it Radiohead that drew you back to the Grammys after a decade, Jas? I do wish the entire band had been there, although the marching band were top notch.

Actually, yes, Gifted, and I apologize for dissing your boys. I quite like early U2 and have several of their albums, but lately they just seem to have, I don't know, become a caricature of their former selves. Okay that's a bit harsh, but they seem to be coming from a different place now.

I can see why, Mr Anchovy. Actually, right after Radiohead performed I went to bed. I think I got myself an extra hour of sleep that way.

Anonymous said...

You just leave my country music alone, Barb.

Will said...

I was planning to live blog the Grammys and then I thought, "Why would I do that?" So I just recorded it and watched MIA and Radiohead today. Seriously, even when the go for relevant performers, the awards are still irrelevant. Kind of pathetic to have such a clueless, self-congratulatory night for a dying industry.

John Mutford said...

I miss Soy Bomb.

Barbara Bruederlin said...

hahaha it appears I am offending people like crazy with this post, Justrun. I like country music, a lot of it anyway, just not that band. Sorry!

True words, Will, it felt like they were borrowing some cred by including certain people - like MIA and Radiohead. Did you notice how very out of place Radiohead appeared?

Well yes, John! I mean, who doesn't? It;s just not the same.

BeckEye said...

Even the promise of Radiohead couldn't make me sit through that shit-fest. The Grammys just make me angry when I watch, so I've decided to stop being such a masochist.

Barbara Bruederlin said...

Wow! And I thought you had endless patience for bad television, Beckeye. I'm actually kinda proud of myself now, for making it through 3 hours of the drek.


I actually don't mind the Grammy's. I just mute the TV during the speeches.

I loved Jennifer Hudson and Adele and was glad to see my longtime fav Alison Kraus pick up the hardware.

I didn't stay up to watch Radiohead, I needed my beauty sleep and I figured you'd have a review on it anyway! ;)

word verif. luver

Barbara Bruederlin said...

Alison Kraus always picks up the hardware, UB. Isn't this her 26th Grammy? I do like her too, though.

You simply must watch the Radiohead performance, if only for the great marching band.

Gifted Typist said...

I know they've got pretty big big and have attracted ridicule as so many big groups do. Sometimes I wish they'd (he'd) tone it down a bit, but their How to Dismantle ... offering was brilliant as are much of there previous stuff - all of which I;ve collected over the years.
I saw them live in 05, and it truly was extraordinary ... I went in liking them a lot, but retaining the dignity of someone who needs to be won over.

They had me on the first note. There was no going back after that.

Dale said...

I really liked the Radiohead piece too. I gave up on the show at some point and walked back into the room and they were just being announced. I thought of you!

Good for M.I.A. and her answer. I didn't see her perform but saw a photo of what she had on, reminded me of Bjork, why don't more people dare to be different?

bloody awful poetry said...

That band, you know, the one that performed with the marching band? They're not too bad. I think I should check them out.Whaddaya think?
(But seriously, even two-fifths of Radiohead was better than everything else at the Grammys put together.)

Also I wish they'd have let M.I.A perform Paper Planes in its entirity. Her outfit was teh shizzle, dude!

MommyLisa said...

OMG - I got totally excited by Dave Grohl banging drums for McCartney!!!!

Katy Pary sux.

but sorry, I also disagree on Kid Rock. I lurve me some dirty white boy.

Barbara Bruederlin said...

You guys have a history and I am not going to take that away from you, Gifted. But yes, when bands get really big, they attract a lot more criticism. Victims of their own success.

Wasn't that an incredible outfit MIA was wearing, Dale? I love her for it, as much as I love Bjork.

Yeah that little band nobody has heard of did a pretty decent job, BAP. Did you notice that they barely even mentioned Radiohead during all the in-show promos? Shameful.
WOuldn't it have been amazing if MIA had performed with them? !!

Dave Grohl's grin was incredible, Mommy. I'll just have to ignore the Kid Rock comment, or I will burst a blood vessel.

justacoolcat said...

I didn't watch the Grammy's and I'm so sorry you did,well except for watching M.I.A. and Zombiohead ofcourse.