I blame Tony Dekker of Great Lake Swimmers.
He seems to have started most recent wave of perfectly normal looking men who suddenly decide that they need to cover up their perfectly normal faces with scruffy facial hair. So suddenly, that becomes this:
And then the madness spreads, and before you know it, you've got Thom Yorke looking like a dishevelled pixie. And that would be fine if the craziness stopped there, because in all honesty, the slightly mad dishevelled pixie look sort of suits Thom. But this wave of hirsutism amongst musicians shows no sign of abating. It's gone viral.
Exhibit A, spotted at the Seattle Radiohead concert - Jonny Greenwood displaying distinct evidence of facial furniture. Suddenly he is transformed from a shy and fragile musical genius into someone who looks as though he has just buried his family in the basement.
Exhibit B - Owen Pallett, transformed from cover boy to stevedore. I submit that if you have a perfectly beautiful face that legions of indie boys and girls swoon over, and you allow it to be hidden behind a beardy thing, you are bordering on criminal activity.
The previous photos should have helped prepare you for the shock of our final case, but it is nevertheless still a disturbing sight. Dear sweet bookish Colin Meloy, a man who should run screaming from the notion of facial hair, is inexplicably sporting a beard (and are those muttonchops?) which would be better suited to an afternoon spent in the clock tower with a deer rifle than amongst the stacks in the library. I would not open the door to this man.
I suppose that now we can also look forward to the sight of even more neck beards among the indie boys in the audience. Oh joy.