Today I ripped apart the equivalent of two phones books with my bare hands.
It was just a few sheets at a time, but it was still rather grueling on the hands, truth be told. Not to mention time consuming.
It was the final step in purging the lab of all the paperwork left behind by the old emperor, which was left to me to deal with. This was on top of the 12 boxes that I arranged to have shredded when some old filing cabinets of his (full) turned up in a hallway.
So on top of the additional 6 boxes that were going to confidential shredding services, there were these two phone books worth of papers that were too sensitive to be recycled and whose regulatory retention periods were not yet passed. I should point out that I don't have access to a shredder.
Enter the human shredder who made hamster bedding out of that mess of papers! It may be years before I am properly able to open a jar of jam again
Number of stinking days of work left at that place in my entire life = 2
Flight of the Conchords are a couple of weird sumbotches.