Monday, August 11, 2008

it tastes like napalm in the morning

Does toothpaste have a best-before date?

I started bringing a few personal items home from work and one of them was a tube of toothpaste that I had in my desk, I think for the last year. Being an abhorrer of waste, I decided to use it up first before starting on the new tube in my bathroom.

What does it mean when your toothpaste goes all grainy tasting?

The tube is almost done, so I figure I will just close my eyes and think of England while I am brushing
for the next couple of weeks, but damn, I never really appreciated before that toothpaste has a very specific mouth-feel.

Speaking of thinking of England, I bought this copy of Word to keep me entertained on the flight to Seattle. I don't think you can tell from this small picture, but is Thom's beardy thingy ever getting grey. Somehow that just makes me love him more.


Dr. Monkey Von Monkerstein said...

Thom could commit mass murder and you'd still love him. :)

Barbara Bruederlin said...

Pretty much, Dr M. To steal a quote, Radiohead could fart in a bag and call it an album, and I would probably still rate it an 8/10.


dr. monkey stole my line. Damn!

Re: the toothpaste - I'm so anal when it comes to things I put in my mouth. Wait a minute that doesn't sound right. Okay, lets just say I'd throw it out. ;)

Joe said...

You know, that toothpaste might have been even more effective because of the added graininess.


Pretty much, Dr M. To steal a quote, Radiohead could fart in a bag and call it an album, and I would probably still rate it an 8/10.

Glad you didn't include that on my mix CD.

mellowlee said...

blech, I think it means you should toss it :OP hehe

Allison said...

Yep, it has an expiry date - should be on the tube...hmmm.

I'm looking forward to see how you're going to write about the concert experience. I think you'll be so gobsmacked its gonna be tricky. :)

bloody awful poetry said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
bloody awful poetry said...

Toothpaste has an expiry date? Oh. That would explain so many things.

And yup! I art an October baby, like Thom and yourself. But I was actually born in the Scorpio half of October, although it doesn't change the fact that people born in October are just so freaking awesome that it's sickening.

Karen said...

Eeew! grainy toothpaste AND Radiohead? Are you trying to tell me you no longer wish me to visit? :(

mister anchovy said...

At the Anchovy house, we like "old school" or "regular flavour" toothpaste. Forget gels. Forget stripes. Just give us the straight up paste. A while back, Tuffy P, always keeping two steps ahead of our needs, bought two big tubes of toothpaste, thinking it was the usual stuff. But, it was super-duper blue gel post-modern deconstructed whitening gel. It was the worst toothpaste I ever tasted. We suffered through the first tube. The second one has mysteriously disappeared.

Barbara Bruederlin said...

Urban Blonde: mmmmmmm, anal toothpaste. Now there's an image that won't quickly get old.
I wanted to include a song from the fart in a bag album on your Radiohead primer, but then decided to save it for the next edition.

That's one of the reasons that I keep using it, Bubs. Well that and I am too cheap to turf it.

I'm pretty stubborn, Mel, if I am determined to use something up I will, even if it kills me, which it very well might.

I don't see an expiry date, Alb, maybe this tube was made before they invented expiry dates.
hahaha I suspect you may be right on the concert review. Do not expect coherency or non-partisanship.

What would it explain, BAP? Now I am curious.
And hell yeah, October babies kick all kinds of ass. I mean we get Hallowe'en AND Thanksgiving (if you are a Canadian October baby).

Oh no, I would be much more upfront about it if that were the case, Karen, although I am pretty good at passive-aggression.
I just like to torment you.

Blech! I am with you on that, Mister Anchovy, it's got to be straight-up regular paste. None of these dessert flavours for me. The Spousal Unit uses some gastly orange stuff which just leaves me shaking my head.
I wonder if the extra tube that Tuffy P bought is going to end up in somebody's Christmas stocking?

zombie said...

For your own sanity not do research as to what toothpaste is actually made of or as to it's history.

Trust me on this.

And Radiohead definitely rocks.

BeckEye said...

I would never gouge out my eyes over Thom, silly. I've grown accustomed to his beardy-thingy.

Oh, and he actually makes good music, unlike SOME people. Belle...Sebastian...I'm looking at you.

Stephanie said...

I just started using organic toothpaste that has no fluorine in it. It's strange

Barbara Bruederlin said...

It's horse hooves and whale sperm, isn't it, Zombie? I knew it! Damn that Proctor and Gamble!
Radiohead are my boyfriends, no question.

I don't understand people be hating on Belle and Sebastian, Beckeye. It makes me question your upbringing.
I have to admit though, Thom is starting to rock the beardy thingy.

Does it taste much different, Stephanie? I'll bet they don't put any weird cinnamon goop in it or anything.

Bridget Jones said...

Have shared that grainy toothpaste experience. Thinking of England? Won't that make it even worse (lol)??

Barbara Bruederlin said...

How old was your tube of grainy toothpaste, Bridget Jones? Over a year? I'm trying to get a feel for why toothpaste goes off.

HAHA, yeah I guess one does not particularly want to spend a lot of time thinking about England and teeth in the same neural synapse.

Gifted Typist said...

Hahahahaha, thinking of England whilst brush teeth.... but so true, that vile vanilla stuff.

Stephanie said...

it still tastes kind of minty, it just tastes a little less chemically if that makes sense? and no, as far as I know, there is no weird cinnamon flavor out there

Barbara Bruederlin said...

They put vanilla flavour in the toothpaste there, Gifted? That's just wrong.

Less chemically is always good, Stephanie, and we can be grateful they left out the weird cinnamon taste.

phlegmfatale said...

Why does Thom look like a Byzantine Christ there, to me?

Barbara Bruederlin said...

I was thinking very much the same thing, Phlegmfatale! It could have something to do with Radiohead not only being the saviours of music, but also now being able to control the weather.