Friday, May 09, 2008

holding up horizons with her hands

I could not believe the rows upon rows of wrapped flower arrangements sitting outside the local florist shop this afternoon, waiting to be delivered to beloved mothers from slightly guilty adult children everywhere.

My own dear mother and the Spousal Unit's Maternal Unit have already received their guilt bouquets and photo albums filled chockablock with snapshots of the much fawned-over Resident Offspring and her parents on their great California odyssey. At their age, it's what they want,
and to be honest, I completely understand their desire to accumulate no more material crap in their lives.

Into this Mother's Day Weekend Eve comes yet another tag from that little vixen,
Bloody Awful Poetry. There appears to be no stopping her, now that she has regained her health.

And this is a particularly fun tag, in that it combines the quirkiness of the random shuffle on my laptop with some arbitrary questions. Old meme that never gets old. It's been forever since I did this one.

I'll even throw in a few mp3s for songs that I think a lot of you won't already have. Because you're so cute.

Of course, with this being Friday, it's also time to play the Friday Random Ten. And being a multi-tasker from way back, I'm combining all of the above to produce The Mother of All Random Playlists (with Questions):

You know how this works:
1. Put your iTunes/ music player on Shuffle2. For each question, press the next button to get your answer.
3. You must put down the song name no matter what. After you’ve answered all of the questions, tag 5 other people and then let them know they’ve been tagged to do the meme themselves

What would best describe your personality?
Meant to Be - Squirrel Nut Zippers
I take this as a compliment, laptop. I like you too.

What do you like in a guy/girl?
Moses? I Amn't - Mogwai
Well nor am I. So we should get along fine.

How do you feel today?
Oliver's Song - John-Rae and the River
John-Rae and the River
always make me feel good. I would listen to them any day! You should too.

What is your life's purpose?
Dogsong aka Sleep Dog Lullaby - the Be Good Tanyas
I actually only sleep about 6 hours a night. Does it show, is that what you are trying to say, laptop? I look tired?
Yeah well you look like shit sometimes too.

What is your motto?
Everybody Knows - James
And since they already know, there is nothing to hide. Party naked.

What do your friends think of you?
We Must Destroy - Jane Vain and the Dark Matter
Those must be my old friends from university. I am a sedate and proper matron now.

What do you think of your parents?
Groovy Train - Spartacus
They get groovier the older I get!

What do you think about very often?

Sex Is Boring - Ballboy
Oh god, I need counseling, don't I?

What do you think of your best friend?
Synethesia - Porcupine Tree
Okay, that's kinda sweet.

What do you think of your crush?
Bone Machine - Pixies

What is your life story?
St. Louis Blues - Louis Prima
Not really, I've had a pretty blessed life, actually.

What do you want to be when you grow up?
Swim for Health - Ballboy
I think it's a little late to perfect my front crawl. But I can swim all the way out to the buoys without stopping.

What do you think when you see your crush?
Australia - the Shins
Good idea. If we ran away to Australia, they would never find us.

What do your parents think of you?

I Drive - the Awkward Stage
Not true, they never drove me anywhere. In fact, the one time my father had to pick me up from a school dance when I cut my foot, he drove to the wrong school, and I got yelled at later because he waited outside the wrong school for half an hour.

What do strangers think of you?
I Can't - Radiohead
Why not? Please, think of me, strangers, please!

How's your love life?
Heaven Knows I'm Miserable Now - the Smiths
Jesus christ on a cracker, it's not that bad, is it? Does it show?

What will they play at your funeral?

Punchdrunk Lovesick Singalong - Radiohead
That would be completely awesome! Especially if everybody did get drunk and started fighting and singing. I would be smiling upon them beatifically from my burlap sack in the forest.

What will you dance to at your wedding?
Piazza, New York Catcher - Belle and Sebastian
A song about watching a baseball game. It's probably a good thing I am planning to stay married to husband number one.

What is your hobby/interest?
Birth, School, Work, Death - the Godfathers
Bullshit! That's not a hobby - that's just life!

What's your biggest secret?
The Dark of the Matinée - Franz Ferdinand
What happens in the matinée, stays in the matinée.

What do you think of your friends?
I Should Get Up - Teddy Thompson
I should! Especially if my friends are waiting.

What song do you listen to when you are sad?
Box Full of Letters - Wilco
That is a little poignant, isn't it?

In love?
Postcards from the Beach - Ballboy
What's not to love about sending postcards from the beach? I'd love that.

What song do you air guitar to?
La Fin du Monde - the Hylozoists
You should see my slo-mo air guitar.

What should be your signature karaoke song?
Something Changed - Pulp
I always thought it would be either the Pogues' Fairytale of New York or Neutral Milk Hotel's Two-Headed
Boy, but I am nothing if not open-minded.

What is your greatest desire?
You Love It - Peaches
Everybody wants somebody (or something) to love.

What does next year have in store for you?

Now I Wanna Be a Good Boy - the Ramones
Obviously I will be settling down next year. And going through gender reclassification.

What's your outlook on life?
Thirteen - Elliott Smith
That's actually generous. Most people accuse me of channeling my inner eight-year-old boy far too much.

How will you die?
Looking at You - the Damned
Right in the eye. And cursing you.

Do people secretly lust after you?
Seven Seas - Echo and the Bunnymen
Only the pirates, apparently.

The best advice you will ever get?
It's Bad You Know - R.L. Burnside
No doubt referring to the outdated yogurt. When in doubt, throw it out.

I am going out on a limb here and tagging everybody on my blogroll to do this one. It's lots of fun. And you can only spend so much time on the phone with your mom.

Have a great Mother's Day weekend everybody! Remember, anybody who has ever birthed a child does not cook, clean, or grocery shop this weekend. It won't kill you to eat takeout for a couple of days.


Allison said...

Brilliant title to this post. Lyrics by chance?

Hmmm...suspect that your funeral song is by Radiohead. ;)

I just discovered Piazza, New York Catcher by Belle and Sebastian on the Juno soundtrack and had it on repeat for the longest time.

Barbara Bruederlin said...

Weakerthans lyrics, Al - might as well steal from the best.
I was hoping for a more dirge-like Radiohead song to usher me out, but this one is worth it for the title alone.
I didn't know Piazza was used in Juno! I haven't seen it yet. That's brilliant, I hope B&S made a pisspot of money.


Happy Mother's Day Weekend Barb!

I think your presents of the California trip albums are a wonderful gift. So much more personal than Gift soaps and lotions that will collect dust in their linen closet.

Your answers to this tag made me LOL and spurt coffee out my mouth (nose still plugged). Hilarious!

I too find it a little suspect that Radiohead made yet another appearance in particular on your funeral song, although I suspect you have their songs in triplicate on your IPOD.

PS Shhhhh don't tell anyone but even though I'm a music teacher I don't own an IPOD. Although the 4 or 5 the other 3 people in my family own make up for it. Right? .... Right?

Barbara Bruederlin said...

You are in good company, Blondie, as I don't own an ipod either. I do have about 70 gajillion songs stored on my laptop though, so that keeps me happy.
And my laptop knows that it must play Radiohead often to keep me happy.
The grandmothers have let it be know in no uncertain terms that they don't want more stuff, so they've been getting this sort of gift for a few years now. Works well too.

And a Happy Mother's Day Weekend to you, Blondie! I hope they treat you like a queen!

Anonymous said...

Happy Stellar Amazing Mother's Day to You, Beautiful Barbara!!!

Your pithy & hysterical comments to the songs that came up are funnier than the songs that shuffled on... I had to read the story about your dad and the wrong school in your time of need to the girls! They now realize how lucky they are. :D

Have a remarkably chillaxing day!!!

justacoolcat said...

Unreal. Your level of clever astounds.

justacoolcat said...

And Happy Mothers Day!

Barbara Bruederlin said...

Happy Mother of All Mother's Day to you too, Michelle! I fully expect your lovely family to treat you like a goddess today (even more than usual).
I am so glad that you were able to use my whining about my mistreatment as a teenager as a teachable moment for your girls. I'll bet they are glad they don't live in the stone age as we did.

Oh I'm hardly clever, JustA, I just have a kickass shuffle on my laptop. Thanks for the Mother's Day wishes. I got chocolate and flowers so far and only half the family is awake. Score!

Anonymous said...

Funny stuff, Barb. I decided to meme along. It was fun.

Barbara Bruederlin said...

I'm glad you played along, Pokecheck! It was a fun diversion, wasn't it? I shall come over to giggle at yours.

Deb said...

First off - Happy day to you and I hope you spend it with your feet up, your spirits high and your wine glass in hand. You truly are a fantastic have to be - look how great the RO turned out.

Secondly - WOW. I was just floored as I'm doing the tag (yes, I'm a go getter today) and it was the "What do you think of your parents?" question. Sometimes these things just bloody fit and I took it as a sign from mom....Song? "Forever My Friend". :)

And yes, photographs (and chocolate) it is. Because who needs more crap?

Although Linds got me the coolest Led Zeppelin poker that girl can find neat stuff.

Joe said...

How very cool and epic! I'll play with that later this week perhaps.

Happy mothers day!

mellowlee said...

Haha! The last one is FUNNY! Happy Mummy's Day Barb XOX

Barbara Bruederlin said...

Happy Mother's Day to you too, Deb! That Linds! Didn't she just find the perfect gift for you?
I'm happy to hear you played along - I shall be over to be awed by your list shortly. And I do take that song as a message from you mom. Bless.

Thanks, Bubs. It's been a pretty great day so far.

Isn't that great, Mel? And I got that song from you too. I hope your Mother's Day is great, despite having to work, damnit.

Barbara Bruederlin said...

Happy Mother's Day to you too, Deb! That Linds! Didn't she just find the perfect gift for you?
I'm happy to hear you played along - I shall be over to be awed by your list shortly. And I do take that song as a message from you mom. Bless.

Thanks, Bubs. It's been a pretty great day so far.

Isn't that great, Mel? And I got that song from you too. I hope your Mother's Day is great, despite having to work, damnit.

668 aka neighbour of the beast said...

first... i was highly confused by the term "Shuffle2". until i finally realized i was reading it all wrong.

then you lost me after bone machine. i will have to re-read this after.

and perhaps play as well.

ps.. i finally posted something for you.

Dale said...

Can't go wrong with John-Rae, another Barbara introduces Dale to more good music moment. I've got a few others of his you posted previously. Nice answers, musical even!

Unknown said...

I'm conflicted by Mother's Day.

The thank-you is distilled down to one day in which mother is wheeled up the flag pole and left to flap in the wind for one day before being wheeled back down to her place again.

Then there are the damning statistics that show woman's economic value declines significantly with the first child and declines further with every other child.

The poorest demographic in our country is elderly women/widows with children.

The whole "Mother's Day" enterprise is appropriated by commercial interests that want to make a buck off people's guilt.

And then your little darlings bring you breaky in bed with the handmade cards with the misspellings and you melt on the spot...


Meme answers a scream, btw.

Anonymous said...

oops, that was me in the last post. I was signed in under another blog that you will find boring but if you want to look

Barbara Bruederlin said...

You weren't reading it wrong, 668, I was cutting and pasting wrong. I need to take remedial cutting and pasting obviously.
I love that story you just posted! A real cautionary tale. And I hope you do the meme - it's fun. (The bone machine answer was my favourite one btw.)

Aren't John-Rae and the River the greatest, Dale? You should go see them if you get a chance, they're from your town.

I doubt very much I could find anything you write boring, Gifted.
It's all too true and too sad that Mother's Day is one of those Hallmark opportunistic holidays. Some of us are fortunate to know that our efforts are appreciated year round, but far too many people only offer lip service to the day. I will never refuse the box of Bernard Callebaut chocolates though.

bloody awful poetry said...

Yes yes, you can all thank ME for the awesomest tag ever, you're welcome, yes, of course, it was no trouble at all.
Glad ya had fun with it! And Happy Mom's Day!! Although in my family it's known as Parent's Day, so my dad doesn't feel all left out and stuff.

Barbara Bruederlin said...

Aww that's nice of you to include your dad, BAP.
It was a really fun meme and a few others have played along now too. Thanks again.