I tried to buy men's underwear today.
Jerry's mom always used to buy him new socks and underwear at Christmas and I thought I would take over the tradition, not that I am trying to be his mother, you can put that thought right out of your head. But it seems like such a useful ubiquitous gift, except if you are Paris Hilton or Britney Spears, I guess.When we were still living in London and used to spend Christmas with Jerry's mom and dad, one year we brought along a friend of ours who had just moved to town and wasn't going home for Christmas.
Jerry's parents quite liked Darryll Dicks, but they could never get a handle on his name. "Harold" was as close as they could get, or sometimes they called him "Dick" or "Rudy" (because he was a ginger). But they couldn't seem to pronounce "Darryll", although being big Toronto Maple Leaf fans, they had no problems with the name Darryl Sittler. Drop the "Sittler" off there, though, and they were lost.
So this one Christmas that Darryll joined us, Jerry's mom bought Darryll a stack of socks and underwear as well. It's what the boys got. And the tag, which I believe Darryll still has to this day, read:
Anyhoo, in the boy's underwear department today, I got a little freaked out, not only by the selection, but also by the packaging. Now I know how men feel if you send them to the drugstore to buy tampons.
I swear some of those packages were digitally enhanced. One in particular had a 3-D effect in the most pertinent location, if you know what I'm sayin'. I kinda wanted to touch it to see if it actually was 3-D, but I was afraid to in case the store security cameras caught me perving out in the men's undie department. I don't want that on my permanent record.
In the end, I left without buying any undies. It was too overwhelming. He's just getting socks.
This week's Friday random shuffle spat this out at me:
1. Munich - Editors
2. California - Stan Rogers
3. Saints - the Breeders
4. Coyote - Joni Mitchell (I think Media Player has a crush on Joni)
5. Backdrifts - Radiohead
6. A Summer Wasting - Belle and Sebastian
7. Deep One Perfect Morning - Jesus and Mary Chain
8. In My Place - Coldplay (ouch, that's a trifle embarassing)
9. Anchorless - the Weakerthans
10. Souvenirs - Christine Fellows (wow that's weird, seeing as Christine Fellows is married to John K Samson of the Weakerthans; isn't it cute how they stick together? See, Media Player is all-knowing).
Have a great Friday night, all you beautiful creatures.
I'm done my Christmas shopping, nyah nyah nyah nyah.!
Time for a big-assed glass of red wine.