When the War Came: gentle readers, start your VCRs
Or whatever fancy recording equipment you use. Or, if it is biologically possible for you, simply stay up late Wednesday, December 20 and watch the Colbert Report. because it is going to be the most important show of the year.
Thanks to the ever-vigilant Will at the Record Room, I first became aware of a festering feud between Stephen Colbert and my beloved Decemberists. Seems Colbert had taken issue with the fact that the Decemberists had filmed their video for O Valencia! against a green screen and were inviting fans to re-animate the video for them. In a segment entitled "Who's Riding My Coattails Now?", Colbert argued that he had in fact invented the green screen challenge with his light saber video and that the Decemberists were nothing but a bunch of sneak thieves. He called upon viewers to edit him into the Decemberists' video where, with his light saber, he would "slice off their legs at the knee".
Things, as they often will, escalated. Colin Meloy then issued a counter challenge via Pitchfork by issuing the "Very First Decemberists vs StephenColbert Guitar Solo Challenge", with this slap in the face: "Let's see what kind of man you really are - Let's SHRED!"
"To further rub salt in the wound, Decemberists' HQ issued the memorandum that "we already played out the light saber thing months earlier, live and on stage-- sans animation, stunt double and fancy green screen-- with pure rock, sweat and C batteries." Ooooh, fightin' words!
And as proof the Decemberists posted this video evidence of a light saber fight during a performance of The Chimbley Sweep at a concert in San Francisco. (I know it's a long video, but it's well worth sticking around to the end just to see the patented guitar god jump.)
And just when you thought it couldn't get any weirder, the intrepid Hilary alerted us to the fact that Colbert had accepted the Decemberists' counter-challenge, and that they will appear on the Colbert Report Wednesday night to compete in a sure to be legendary guitar solo challenge. Colbert claims to even be giving the band "home-field advantage by having the contest in December."
The Decemberists, never a band to shy away from an adversary, will send in multi-instrumentalist Chris Funk to take on Colbert in a death match. Here's Funk's strategy for total guitar solo challenge domination:
"I'm going to dust off my white high-top Reeboks, slide on my stirrup pants and chug a two-liter of Mountain Dew."
Oh, it's on!