Friday, November 17, 2006

Nothing says Christmas like a giant plastic walrus

I took Eva to Zeller's after school today, and that particular mall, which is decidedly less upscale than some of the others around here, was all decked out in its mismatched Christmas finery. We've always admired the nativity scene they put up each year, in which the donkeys are about 7 times larger than the humans, but this year they had the addition of a rather glorious giant plastic walrus. Made me feel all Christmasy, it did.
Less so the tumour-inducing Christmas music they had blaring over the loudspeakers in the underwear department of Zellers. When they started playing Jingle Bell Rock, I knew if I didn't get out of there I was going to be forced to choke a bitch.
I used an old workout cd today, and was immediately snapped back to Ben's recent post on the Record Room, in which he asked about great first-line lyrics in songs. Check out these opening lyrics:
Today I'm leaving this bullshit one-horse town for the cowboys and indians
who only have balls when there's a camera around
- Matthew Good's Long Way Down
Had one of those days when you want to try heroin,
drunk driving, some form of soft suicide
- the Weakerthans' Leash
Who says you have to end your workout with smiley happy tunes all the time?
I still can't figure out how to change the clock in my car. Ever since the switch from daylight savings time, I randomly press buttons and fiddle with switches whenever I'm at a red light, but all I've managed to do was mess up all the preset radio buttons. And I changed the time in the spring! I'm going to have to haul out that 780 page manual over the weekend.
Speaking of random, have you done a random shuffle Friday playlist? Here's mine:
The lord is my shotgun - Primal Scream
Come crash - AC Newman
Glad tidings - Van Morrison
National hum - the Constantines
Armada - Public Image Ltd
Me in honey - REM
Know your rights - the Clash
Slip inside this house - Primal Scream
For you - Tracy Chapman
The first song - Band of Horses
I see my laptop loves Primal Scream. I always knew it had exquisite taste.
Don't forget to post yours over at Just a Cool Cat's place.
Coming up tomorrow - my review of the Chad VanGaalen's cd release party which took place last night. I promise!
Was it great or awful? Did Chad tell any poop stories? Who was the surprise opener? What was the Uptown Theatre like as a musical venue?
If you don't come back, you will never know.
Hope your Friday night rawks.


mellowlee said...

I heart that plastic walrus. He needs a santa hat! Still too early for Xmas music in malls Bleh! Maybe you could play that Punk xmas cd to blast the memory from your mind! I love it when the music player choses the same artist over. :D I'm looking forward to your review!! I bet it was fun.

Barbara Bruederlin said...

It was soooooo much fun, Mel! Oh no, now you know, but you have to promise to come back for details, as Chad was adorable beyond belief in his bumbling 8-year-old boy way.

GOOD idea on playing the Punk xmas cd. I will do that while I'm making supper, as I've only had the chance to listen to it once, and that, my friend, is not near enough.
btw - the walrus sadly had no Santa hat but was surrounded by fake white plastic snow. It was glorious.

mellowlee said...

I love the idea of that walrus!
Of course I will come back for the details :D !!!! I think I'm going to listen to the punk xmas right now.

Barbara Bruederlin said...

I'm listening to it right now, Mel - dancing around the kitchen slapping hamburgers together and singing "get drunk at Christmas with me". It's really festive - perfect for a Friday night. Thanks again, hon!

Allison said...

Tease!! I need poop stories to share with friends over

I love walruses, truly. Much like grapefruit is an underrated fruit, I find the walrus an underated animal. I'm thinking by the looks of this weather I'm going to have to bust out the fake snow to make a glorious holiday season.

Those Matt Good lyrics are mighty good. I've been listening to the Pretenders today after Ben posted the 'Hymn for Her', which too has the best opening lines. A punk christmas cd? Your own mix? Sounds fabulous.

Allison said...

"Those Matt Good lyrics are mighty good"...time to step away fromt the computer and go out for dinner. Shakes head at myself. You know what I mean.

Anonymous said...

Oops, I just read Allison's post and I'm in the same predicament except I still have to wash my hair!

Looking forward to tomorrow's post especially after reading the, "It was soooooo much fun quote!"

Always did like Van Morrison.

Barbara Bruederlin said...

Allison, it is not your fault that Matty has a name that is also an adjective! That Pretenders' song was gorgeous! I think I need to listen to it again tonight as well.

Mel made the Punk Xmas mix! It's brilliant, so glorious and profane!

That walrus really was pretty special. I've always been partial to otters myself (the showman of the ocean) - hmm, reminds me of our frontman vs bassist chat. Remind me to tell you the bassist story from last night...

Have fun at dinner!

Leazwell said...

About two weeks ago, one of the local grocery store chains brought in live Christmas trees to sell. Leaves me numb BUT I have to say the walrus would have moved me, too. A refreshing touch.

Barbara Bruederlin said...

Sorry I missed you there, Toccata. You get to go out for dinner too? You'd better get hopping, missy! Have a fun night!

We're just staying in and eating burgers and drinking some red wine.
And listening to a punk Christmas mix.

Dale said...

We're not going to have to use that plastic walrus as our tattoo model are we Barbara? :-)

668 aka neighbour of the beast said...

i, too, love the walrus. nothing says christmas to me than marine life. no santa hat? tsk tsk. at least they could have put antlers on it.

all this christmas talk is making me feel festive. and it reminds me that i haven't even started planning my xmas cd yet. eeeeek!

Barbara Bruederlin said...

Dang, I am one step behind everyone tonight - sorry Leazwell, now I've missed YOU.
I say we call for a moritorium on all the Christmas-immediately-following-Hallowe'en marketing. Okay,I can see pushing the Christmas chocolate, but trees? Blasphemy! But the walrus, I'll admit, was pretty cool.

Dale, I think you've hit the nail on the head, actually. We should form the fraternity (soriety?, fratoriety?) of the walrus. And anyone with a walrus tattoo meets on Fridays for poker, random playlists, and plotting world domination.

Christmas cd? You are far better organised than I am, 668. Although I do subject the people on my mailing list to a dreaded Christmas letter. hahaha it's my way of making people suffer for all the crap I've gone through all year.
That walrus would have looked pretty sweet with antlers, though.

phlegmfatale said...

IM LUVN UR plastic walrus.

My favorite first line of a song this year goes to Neko
"My true love drowned in a dirty old pan of oil that did run from the block of a Falcon sedan 1969..."
I love that shit.

Barbara Bruederlin said...

"... the papers said '75". Fantastic opening lines, Phlegmfatale! I think you win. Those lines give me the chills.

And you have got the IM N UR spirit, my dear!

668 aka neighbour of the beast said...

i do a christmas cd every year for my friends. i collect christmas music so it's very offbeat.

Allison said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Allison said...

Yeah, listening to the Pretenders always puts me in a good mood.

Wow, everyone seems to be making a Christmas mix. I'm working on a mix to give out at Christmas to friends as well. All Canadian, mainly indie stuff, its slowly turning into a signiture mix. I love making mixed cds.

Yes! A bassist story, I await with glee.
BTW, "I've always been partial to otters myself (the showman of the ocean)" is one for the Quote wall, if you don't mind.

Barbara Bruederlin said...

That's a great idea, 668. I'll bet they look forward to receiving your specialty cd. Sure beats the hell out of socks.

Allison, I would be honoured to be quoted about otters,haha!
The bassist story is more of an observation, but it made me think of you. I'll include it in the review.
I seem to be the only one not planning a cd mix. Or maybe I just haven't started thinking about Christmas yet...

Ben Heller said...

I really like the sound of that random mall christmas experience. It sounds much more fun than the glitzy, false and very expensive ones you see in the big malls.

It sounds like they'd got no budget so they did the best with what they'd got and I LOVE THAT.

Christmas is more humane when it's ramshackle around the edges.
And the mall has it.

Like your random 10 Barbara, and you need me to come around and fix your clock.

I'm not much use at anything practical, but I have a knack for fixing electronic things, Hi-fi's, TV's, and car electrics.

Anonymous said...

Is it alright if I just draw a walrus on me every week, and say it is a tattoo?? I want in on this poker, and taking over the world stuff....

I for one love christmas music. I often preview my collection before halloween because I miss it so much (red face). Then once halloween is over, its Christmas music until I get sick of it sometime near the end of January. This year, I am up to 251 songs,but only 13.7 hours. I need more. Suggestions?

Steffi *salutes the walrus*

Barbara Bruederlin said...

Ben,I shall expect you for dinner today and you can just pop out and change my car clock after we've dined.

There is something definitely endearing about the slight shabbiness of those mall decorations. I love how the relative sizes of the various creatures is immaterial. I just wish that all shops would wait a few more weeks...

Barbara Bruederlin said...

Wow, Steffi! Your stamina is amazing! I admit that I like Christmas music as well, and often drive my family bonkers with my attempts at singing along with the Messiah. This year though, instead of the standard Christmas fare during our annual tree decorating and nuts-and-bolts baking day, we will be playing the Punk Christmas mix that Mellowlee made. She would be an excellent person to talk to about new songs.

Personally I wil always love Fairytale of New York by the Pogues and Kirsty MacColl. Do you have that one? Oh, and Eartha Kitt's Santa Baby.

And drawn-on walrus tattoos are perfectly acceptable.

mellowlee said...

Ooh I love Fairytale of New York too! I didn't put it on that mix, cause I just figured everyone must have it *G*
I'm so excited, I just found two cups of water at the back of my fridge LOL! Im going to make a nice cup of tea!

We just may be moving to Alberta in the spring!!

Barbara Bruederlin said...

Seriously, Mel? Moving here? That would be beyond fantastic!

I'm so happy for you that you are getting to enjoy a nice cuppa. I hope it's the best tea you ever had.

Barbara said...

Does the car clock have a button you need a pen tip to press? Mine does. When I press that button it allows me to change the time. I hope it's that simple for you Barbara B.

mellowlee said...

It was lovely!!! And yes! I hope we can swing it. I have my heart set on it now, and when my mind is made up, Im quite stuborn! :)

Barbara Bruederlin said...

It's done now, Barbara W. I had to press the menu button long enough for it to beep twice and then use the seek button to change the time. Dead simple, but it took me a few weeks to figure it out. But at least now I won't have a panic attack on the way to work anymore.

Mel, that would be so great, I can't even tell you. I would love for you to move here. (I'm already planning what businesses we could start hahaha)

mellowlee said...

LOL! Hey, whatever you think up, I'm game *G*

Barbara said...

Billy Idol just released a Christmas Album....
What does this mean for us?

I think the world is coming to an end.

phlegmfatale said...

I'll draw a walrus tattoo on me as soon as a walrus draws a me tattoo on itself. Fair trade.

kees said...

Gargantuan donkeys and plastic walruses? AH the nostalgia for christmases past.

Barbara Bruederlin said...

I somehow knew you would be game for whatever comes up, Mel.

You could be right on that, Barbara W. Looks like Mr Idol is trying to stage a come-back.

Can't argue with that logic, Phlgemmy. Fair's fair.

I know, Kees, makes me all weepy.