Saturday, July 15, 2006

Never Buy Pink Sheets

That's my advice to you today.

If your kid goes through a pink-loving phase, don't give in and buy pink sheets. Eva's pink-loving phase last about 15 minutes when she was 4, during which time I succumbed to the pressure, and now I am stuck with these butt-ugly pink bedsheets that are in perfect condition. So whenever we have overnight guests, I am stuck with the dilemma of do I use these pukey, but quality, sheets in the guest room? And if I do, do I risk making my guest ill or worse think that I have a pink fetish.

My oldest sister is coming for an overnight visit today and she gets the pink sheets. My oldest sister, the complainer. I love her dearly and she has a wonderful and kind heart, but my fuck, she complains constantly. It's actually gotten to the point where I keep track of how many complaints can get squeezed into a 15 minute phone conversation, because I know when I get off the line, my snarky family is bound to ask.

I've been listening to far too much Jesus and Mary Chain lately. Actually, no I haven't been, because who am I harming anyway? I missed out on the JAMC when they were still a band and am simply making up for lost time.

I was musing the other day, as to whatever happened to William and Jim Reid (after the mental breakdowns and the run for Scottish parliament), and found the answers on the fansite April Skies.

Bobby Gillespie, of course, went on to front Primal Scream and looks surprisingly good for someone in their 40s who has ingested as many toxins as he has over his lifetime.

Eva is a wealth of information about JAMC, as she is about most things musical, and she has agreed to guest post a JAMC segment, as some of you have said you would be interested in that. It will make up for the pink sheets.

Here's a sweet song haha from the JAMC - Just Like Honey

Upload music at Bolt.


Allison said...

'Just Like Honey' and 'April Skies' are two of my favs, glad to have them mentioned in one post! I feel the same way about JAMC, can't overload it. I missed them during the time they were actually a band as well, and I haven't really gone out of my way to find out stuff about them, I just have all the albums, so I look forward to Eva's post!
Never buy pink sheets is sound advice ;)

Barbara Bruederlin said...

I don't even have all the albums, Allison, so you are a way better JAMCer than me.

Eva says she doesn't really know all that much about the band (she does so), but she sure knows her band gossip.

hilary m. said...

Pink Bedsheets!
Sounds very cool.
I have some suggestions. You could sell them to the Pepto-Bismal people, to feature in one of thier commercials. You could cut eyeholes in them, and you'd have the perfect halloween costume. That's what I did last year. Cut up some flowered sheets, draped a cardboard sign around my head that said something about my parents being negligent and went around the streets.

John Mutford said...

Every now and then you mention a band or song that I've plum forgotten about. I don't have a lot of JAMC songs, but I've gone back to listen to "Snakeblood" from the Crow soundtrack. Not my favourite song or anything, but still good and I'm glad you inspired me to look back!

Will said...

Agreed ... no amount is too much when it comes to the JAMC.

And your rule can be - complain and feel the wrath of the pink sheets.

Barbara Bruederlin said...

Yes, Hilary - a Pepto-Bismal ghost! That's what I'm talkin' about! I guess I'll have to wash those sheets before Hallowe'en then.

It's give and take, John. You inspired me to look back through my Simpsons' books. My child is the one who keeps me both current and nostalgic on music. It's one big cycle of life, it is!

Oh no, it's too late, Will! The pink sheets are already in place. That means free reign to complain.
That's a fine house rule to implement though. I thank you; in your honour I shall listen to some more JAMC.

Leazwell said...

About those pink could tone them down by swapping out either the fitted or top sheet with a white one or some other printed sheet that would blend. That way your guest(s) won't feel like he/she is being swathed in Pepto-Bismal. ;]

Barbara Bruederlin said...

That's a good idea, Leazwell - maybe I'll hold off cutting the eye holes in the sheet for now anyway. Why did they make Pepto-Bismal that horrid colour anyway?

Alana said...

Probably because it would be green otherwise and no one wants to swallow green medicine...

I would be afraid of pink sheets. Then again, I stay away from anything pink. Unless it's either a) cotton candy, or b) cream soda slurpees. Then I'm all over it.

I believe I'm the only person in your blog world that has never listened to JAMC. I officially have another name on my download list. Thank you.

kees said...

'Just Like Honey' what an absolute stonker!! I loves it. I must shamefully admit to also loving the pink sheets but please don't judge me :)

Very much looking forward to the JAMC posts...poor Eva! The pressure!

Barbara Bruederlin said...

Or brown, Alana, brown medicine would be a hard sell as well. Then again, yellow meds remind me of the banana flavoured antibiotics I had to take as a kid. shudder.
I'm blaming this JAMC mini revolution on Eva, as she got me hooked on them. And I have to check out the band that you mentioned to Allison as well. It's all give and take.

"stonker", Kees? What a fabulous word! And I should send those pink sheets to you, and the world would be in balance once again. Okay, maybe not.
Poor Eva, indeed, I think she may be feeling in over her head.

Jas Bhambra said...

I like pink! Although I don't have pink sheets! :)

Good suggestions there, HIlary! :)

mellowlee said...

For some reason, a few months ago, I almost bought pink flannel sheets. I was actually going to buy a package of pink and a package of chocolate brown : I don't remember why. Maybe I was craving neopolitan icecream. A moment of insanity perhaps? Anyways, glad I didn't heehee.
btw I was your 2000 profile visitor today. do i get a cake? maybe a little neopolitan icecream with that? *WG*
Hope you are having a great weekend Barbara!

kim said...

Toss the sheets in the wash with a capful of bleach and just bleach 'em white. I like Leazwell's idea too though. Something with a cute contrast.

Barbara said...

Tie dye?

Alana said...

Banana flavoured children's antiobiotics, by the way...DELICIOUS. I loved that stuff.

A couple year's back I was babysitting an old friend's 2 year old son and he had that prescription, and everytime it was time for him to take it, I tasted it.

Mmmmmmmmmmmmm, banana.

Barbara Bruederlin said...

Those pink sheets are going to end up as ghosts, Jas.

DING, DING, DING, DING!!!!!!!!! 2000th profile visitor! Wooooohoooo!!!
Mellowlee, you win the grand prize - a beautiful set of pink sheets - barely used! Winging their way to you via pony express.

Hi Kim, welcome! Bleach! Why didn't I think of that? White sheets are cool, I can handle that. (and make much more authentic ghosts)

And tie dye is another good thought, Barbara W. I could make myself a fetching gown for the Folk Festival.

eeeewwwwww, Alana! Bananas = good, fake bananas = bad.
The poor kid probably never got over his infection with you quaffing back his antibiotics.

Alana said...

Yeah, but *I* felt FANTASTIC!!

Besides, he was one of those kids who always had an ear infection or runny nose or chest infection or all of the above all the time and there was never a shortage of banana medicine (or nana'cine, as he called it) in their household.

And I only TASTED it! :P

Barbara Bruederlin said...

hahaha Alana - well he deserved it then - the sick little bugger.
okay kidding

mellowlee said...

yay! I can hardly wait! lol
Maybe Alana would like a bag of those banana flavoured marshmellow candies. you know, the ones that are ummm banana shaped?

Alana said...




Mellowlee, those have got to be the best candies on the planet. I would LOVE some of those!

*huge grin*

Barbara, I don't know if he deserved it, but he sure did like when I had some. We'd go to the fridge, I'd open the bottle, pour some into that little kid's medicine spoon, he'd point and me and say "you!", so I'd have a little bit, then I'd say "you!" and he'd down the whole thing.

A very enjoyable (and effective) game. :P

chuck said...

Pink sheets are THE BEST...for bedtime strawberry ice cream parties!

~Jen~ said...

i predict in a short while i will be left with FAR too much LIME GREEN bedding....better then pink but weird all on its own

Barbara Bruederlin said...

Mellowlee - let me get this straight: banana-shaped, banana-flavoured marshmallows. I am dumbfounded. I'm going back to bed.

aww Alana, what a good babysitter you were! I would always just sit on the couch and tell the kids to bring me more crack.

See, here's the thing, Chuck. You thought I was hard on banana-flavoured stuff? That was nothing. Yu should see me with strawberry-flavoured stuff. It's all-out war.

It'd make a nice combo with the pink perhaps, Jen. Wanna do a swap? Or you could always use the extra lime green sheets in your frog bathroom somehow.

Alana said...

LOL @ crack Barbara! That was hilarious!

Banana-shaped banana marshmallows, and strawberry-shaped strawberry marshmallows, both are 5 cents, and both are delicious.

Barbara Bruederlin said...

5 cents each, Alana? What a ripoff!

mellowlee said...

*sigh* Remember when penny candies were in fact 1 penny? And you could buy a chocolate bar, and pack of cigs, a comic book or two and some gum, and a pop for under 5$? And pop came in glass bottles?

I loved those double bubble's with the comic in them. That taste puts me into a nostalgic frenzy

tydes said...

The only pink things I enjoy are between a lady's legs.

Ok, sorry for putting that dirty spin into your comments but... that's me, right?

Barbara Bruederlin said...

Jeff, it was about time somebody did! I'm just surprised Jen didn't beat you to it.

phlegmfatale said...

Just like Honey = one of my all-time favorites - have the original album on vinyl from when it first flew steaming into the record store. Good shit. Pink shits - decided to leave the typo - I'd tie-dye the pink sheets - use brown and black - it'll be super-funky. Or how about orange and red. Could be funky.

phlegmfatale said...

Stopping playing this song is the hardest thing for me to do. I've played it through like, 20 times. Thanks. It's a happy recollection.

Barbara Bruederlin said...

Brown and black with the pink would be seriously sassy, Phlegmfatale. Love the typo - pink shits - it does indeed.

Very nice use of JAMC lyrics there. Of course you are an original fan, I don't know what I was listening to at the time - some crap, no doubt. But yes, they are totally and utterly addictive. For me it's even spilling over into listening to Primal Scream. The madness never ends.

Barbara Bruederlin said...

I'm sorry, Mellowlee - I didn't answer you. How rude!
I remember 10 cent chocolate bars, that 's how old I am. And yeah, you can only find gum in bubble packs anymore. What do they need to protect? It's gum!
Pop in glass bottles though *shudder* - glad to see the end of that. I had 20 stitches in my hands from an exploding one.

tydes said...

I'm stunned that Jen didn't say something first. I don't usually beat her to the punch unless I'm saying something really off the wall.

Barbara Bruederlin said...

Jen must be off her game, Jeff. It's all that badminton with the gay guys...